Stay In Your Lane (2 Samuel 13)
2 Samuel 13
Most of the last twenty years of David’s life were marked by personal tragedy and pain.
It begins with David’s oldest son, Amnon, who is portrayed as over-indulgent and selfish and is pining for his younger, half-sister, Tamar, who is portrayed as a beautiful young woman, who is not married, a virgin, and highly valued by King David’s court. An advisor to Amnon, Jonadab, who is himself a nephew of David, sees Amnon moping around and says, “Look, if you really love this girl, pretend to be ill, and when David comes to see you, ask him to send Tamar to make you some food. Amnon follows Jonadab’s advice and David agrees to send Tamar. So Tamar comes into Amnon’s private chamber and makes him some food to eat. But instead of Amnon eating and feeling grateful and encouraged, he sends all of his attendants out and rapes her. Then, to make matters worse, the Bible says that he despises her after his act of violence and has her thrown out, which Tamar says was worse than the crime. David hears about all of this and is furious, but does nothing. So Tamar’s older and full-brother, Absalom, comforts Tamar and brings her into his home. He is also plotting his revenge.
Absalom allows two years to go by. He throws a sheep shearing celebration and invites all of David’s sons, including Amnon. Amnon is well known for his over-indulgence, and Absalom instructs his servants that when Amnon is drunk, they are to kill him, which they do. The rest of the brothers see that the oldest son is dead and they flee Absalom’s house to Jerusalem. David gets a report of the incident and believes that all of his sons are dead. David and his court are mourning the death of his sons, when David receives a more specific report, from Jonadab, who is at least partially complicit in all of this, that only Amnon is dead. David mourns the loss of his oldest son and longs to be with Absalom.
The story does not need a lot of complicated interpretation and stands on its own merit. It’s a story of an innocent young woman, who is sexually abused by an older, half-brother, and avenged by an older full-brother. Yet what may not be as obvious is David’s response to this event, because this is a recurring pattern in David’s like. He struggles to confront these strong willed, young men in his life. We first see it with his nephews, Asahel, Abishai and Joab. At one time he said, “These sons of Zeruiah are too strong for me!” And now we see it with his own sons. It was David that should have brought comfort to Tamar. It was David that should have brought justice to this whole affair and confronted his son, Amnon. But because of his lack of action, a great deal of animosity and division between David and Absalom. Absalom would eventually lead a revolt against David and try to usurp his throne, losing his life in the effort.
When you look at the life of David, in many respects, it’s difficult not to admire him, or perhaps even envy him. Here’s a man who is good looking, rich and powerful, an international leader with lots of beautiful women around him. And if that weren’t enough, he’s a very gifted musician. But when you look past the veneer of all the external qualities of his life, you see a lot of deep flaws, personal failures and tragedy – just like you do every other human.
The writer of Hebrews says that we are to run the race marked out for us and fix our eyes on Jesus. Our eyes are to be looking forward, not wandering from side to side to see who we are passing, or over our shoulder to see who’s catching up. We aren’t supposed to be looking with envy at those who are running before us. We are supposed to be content and stay in our lane and run our race. I’m not called to be the best David I can be, I’m called to be the best Jim I can be – transformed by God’s spirit and word. When I run my race, stay in my lane and keep my eyes on Jesus, I am far happier and more content. And you will be to.